Powerlessness is the inability to do something in our own strength of mind, will or physical effort. Our personal powerlessness often is first experienced in a situation that makes us feel humiliated. This feeling encompasses fear, anger, helplessness, and weakness, or being out of control. We do not like these feelings, in fact, we detest them, and so we never want to admit powerlessness. Powerlessness is a synonym for all that we do not want to become.

When we come to treatment it is because we truly have become powerless over an addiction. We may or may not agree to this condition. If after we come to treatment and are unable to come to terms with our individual powerlessness, we will fail eventually to stay clean or sober. Why do we fail?

We really do not think we have to stop using or drinking. We believe that we can somehow overcome this temporary problem and use again after submitting to terms of treatment. We do not accept the fact that we have failed to control our using. We are not honest with ourselves or with others. Then, we cannot in anyway believe we have been insane as we used. Or we rationalize our behavior, secretly thinking that if we know enough about what happened, we can control the outcome “next time”.

We struggle against the thought of surrendering our willpower while refusing to perceive life differently. We resist new ideas and cling to old ways of thinking. We think we are showing strength of mind or will and that we do have personal power as we deny our need for help. And we return to our former behaviors. What we really are exhibiting is our own inability to choose a new way of living underscored with a new way of thinking-- that of reliance upon the help from others and from God.

Our culture’s heroes are those imbued with powerful attributes of one kind or another. We see them in our cartoons like Superman or Spider man. We are impressed with the success of an athlete who has overcome great odds to win, exhibiting a powerful will to do so. We are beset with examples of the self-made made man or woman, the “survivor’. We even can watch a TV series about being the one to outsmart and outlast others to win the contest of survival. Magazines display the lives of the very rich, the most popular, and the most successful people. Turn on the radio or the stereo and listen to the very popular song, “I Did It My Way”. Books by the dozens present a multitude of ways to be successful if we just follow the ideas the author presents. What is missing? Why are we careening madly from one fad, one idea, and one method to another? Where is the thought of God?

We who think we have the power and can stand on our own become the most lonely, the most powerless, and the most lost. We can become the most godless. We lose even though we at first don’t think so. After all, did not those others get what they wanted? They were smarter, stronger, faster, quicker. They relied on themselves and they are a success. But wait; is this not an illusion? There is no joy or peace in a never-ending race to get the power, to get the goodies. There is never enough. There is no soul. There is no God. Ultimately, it looks like just being powerless and we never really wanted to go there.

What is true power, then? Where does it come from? What does it look like? The Alcoholics Anonymous book cites paradoxes of recovery. One of these paradoxes states, “We surrender to win”. This concept is illustrated in the AABB statement, chapter 5, that “We are now on a different basis; the basis of trusting and relying on God. We trust infinite God rather than our finite selves”. When we admit that we cannot control our drinking or using, we have no hope. Then, when we come to believe in God’s redeeming power, we find protection, care, and strength. As we surrender, we choose to stop struggling or fighting for our own way of thinking. We become willing to accept guidance from God that God so gladly and abundantly wants to give us. We admit our need, our lack of power, or our weakness and find power—the empowerment of God in us or in our circumstances.

By becoming humble, i.e., knowing that we need God, we surrender and accept that God gives us the power to live life free of addiction. We no longer care if others think that we look weak and foolish if we rely on God. We realize that doing it our way brought us the kind of life we did not want-dependency and addiction. We begin to discover that we were the loneliest of the lonely. We begin to understand that we are truly alone when we are in self-will. We see that our restlessness is from our struggle and resistance to accepting God’s way for us. We can only reside in discontent because there is no peace in an inner war. Therefore, we surrender ourselves to the care of God and find serenity. In accepting God’s help, we find strength. When we let God enter in, we find power within because HE dwells there. We will no longer be alone. We will no longer be lost. We will no longer be powerless. We will become a paradox.